Rebirth is a vicious possession, the earth recycling breathe Always pregnant, yawning belly, a wound full of mad, bound creatures waiting to escape into the songless sky The earth, new and so wild with yearning. I fall to its wetness, its soils hungrily ingest my body, slowly too, like a caress Where are you taking me, you gaping mouth? I grow swollen with putrid death My wounds tear open, birth a flower My petals flutter, flutter away in the mourning wind What would you name this offering where you are from?
Today, my body becomes strange / to me I pinch off a hair of flesh, relearn how to engrave a poem (myself) into dust; Each artless, desperate caress from my blind fingers yearning for light echoes through my body / as though I’m hollow As though there’s nothing inside me but thin air. How to fill something so hollow? Every day, I awaken to my body 's strangeness, its language I stutter / I'm the travelling, swollen river collected in the bosom of the lost. I do not know what my boundaries are; where I begin, where I'm going I struggle with containment I cannot say I'll make the journey whole I pour too much give too much remake myself empty. This river has overflown its banks.
I want to blossom so beautiful I hold on to the sun and its tongue, I do not let go-- Let it burn me a little, make me vivid. I want to live loud (again) so, I accept the water, let it drown me. I think I'm addicted to being dust, remade into water– Something about their consuming, endless boundlessness Give me over to the void.
(LIFE IS) A POT FULL OF DEATHS
I collect the raindrops on my tongue, tasting the sourness of history, of memory All the deaths it has watered Life is a gathering of small deaths; The last wisp of sweetened smoke from the end of a burning incense, The evanescence of a shape prayed into the clouds, The flutter of shadowed birds floating home, The fading of a grandmother('s voice) As she regales her children, new faces painted by the tender touch of moonlight, Of all the deaths she has, Cradled in her ìgbànu, tied to the folds of her wrapper Lingering on her belongings Choking, beckoning Teasing her feet of land.
Death calls and Child, listen, you must tame it Go to all the funerals let death claim you, sit with it, let it permeate your body, smell like it, listen to its song Help wash the dead, And when it's time to greet them goodnight The frozen flesh of their palms open, to cradle your parting elegies sift through the river of memories and pluck out, cup a prayer, a gift This is your offering.
Bio: Aishat Yahkub is a Nigerian creative, poet, art lover and medical student. Her poems appear in Brittle paper, Agbowó, Variety pack, Fiery scribe review and elsewhere. Her works explore the fluidity of identity, language and portrayal of "home", through her cast of outcasts. When it's silent, she practices stillness and escapes into dreams.